Brazilians have a hard time not dancing when there's music. People love to say this of themselves. What they usually mean is that they tap their toe. Brazilians dance.
Sometimes I play music in class.
I mark the ground where the desks are. By the end of class the desks have always shifted a few inches. On days with music the travel can be measured in feet.
Today Robert wants to play a song after class. It reminds me of a rap rendition of Father Abraham. The tune is trendy enough, but the lyrics play Simon Says with a list of body parts and directions. It's a perfect sucker punch. We'll trick the kids into practicing English.
Unless they wont dance.
As soon as the music starts, twenty girls are glued to the wall. Roberts attempts at coercion result in screams and scattering. He walks away and twenty girls snap back to the safety of their wall by invisible bungee cords. They are flat against the bricks.
But Brazilians have a hard time not dancing when there's music.
They're trying not to, but every now and then something slips out. These intermittent hiccups of dancing have more movement in two dimensions than most dancers can pull off in three.
Showing posts with label Brazil. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Brazil. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Day 18: My Finest Student
It's a nice day and I'm sitting outside with a student after class. She studies, but its just so hard. The quiz had eight words. She never studied. No, those were hard words!
Four of the words were cognates, they were not hard words. Nope, she sticks to her guns. Clearly I just don't understand. English is like totally super hard.
Why is she determined to convince me of this? If you want to learn, great. Come to class, pay attention, and study. If not, great. Come to class, listen to headphones, and play games with everyone afterwards. She thinks for a minute.
I'm finally getting through to her how much I don't care.
Noooo, but she iiiiiiis trying!
Never mind.
She demonstrates the early warning signs of a lengthy tirade. Trying to follow a thirteen year old on a tangent is difficult in any language. They rarely make sense."Jeans" on the other hand, is "jeans" in every language. It was not a hard quiz.
I give up and interrupt her with two claps. Hector's instantly at my side. "Sit" Hector sits. "Lay down" he lays down. "Stand up" he rolls over. oops.
"uh.. Roll over?" he stands. I switch to Portuguese and praise him on a perfect four out of four. "All right, now go away before you screw up on something she knows." He goes back to hide from the sun under a car.
She asks me which soccer team I like.
Nice work Hector.
Four of the words were cognates, they were not hard words. Nope, she sticks to her guns. Clearly I just don't understand. English is like totally super hard.
Why is she determined to convince me of this? If you want to learn, great. Come to class, pay attention, and study. If not, great. Come to class, listen to headphones, and play games with everyone afterwards. She thinks for a minute.
I'm finally getting through to her how much I don't care.
Noooo, but she iiiiiiis trying!
Never mind.
She demonstrates the early warning signs of a lengthy tirade. Trying to follow a thirteen year old on a tangent is difficult in any language. They rarely make sense."Jeans" on the other hand, is "jeans" in every language. It was not a hard quiz.
I give up and interrupt her with two claps. Hector's instantly at my side. "Sit" Hector sits. "Lay down" he lays down. "Stand up" he rolls over. oops.
"uh.. Roll over?" he stands. I switch to Portuguese and praise him on a perfect four out of four. "All right, now go away before you screw up on something she knows." He goes back to hide from the sun under a car.
She asks me which soccer team I like.
Nice work Hector.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Observation #25: Counting
There are 104 professional soccer teams in the state of São Paulo. One hundred and four.
Three of them are named The Fifteenth of November. Last year The Fifteenth of November beat The Fifteenth of November and The Fifteenth of November back to back.
Three of them are named The Fifteenth of November. Last year The Fifteenth of November beat The Fifteenth of November and The Fifteenth of November back to back.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Day 16: Forest Frolic
6:00 a.m.
The road through the mountains of the Atlantic Coastal Rainforest is pleasant. Rainy season is just ending and the flowers are in bloom. The steep mountains and deep ravines are capped with clouds and filled with fog. The road itself is an engineering marvel.
8:00 a.m.
Brazilians don't care much for the jungle. They stay at the cabin. I explore the jungle.
1:30 p.m.
DO NOT smell the green ones.
2:00 p.m.
Nosebleed stops.
6:30 p.m.
Jungle mosquitoes are overrated. Twelve hours spent in a tropical rainforest, and they have given me no problem.
8:30 p.m.
Jungle mosquitoes are nocturnal. They swarm. They bite through jeans.
The road through the mountains of the Atlantic Coastal Rainforest is pleasant. Rainy season is just ending and the flowers are in bloom. The steep mountains and deep ravines are capped with clouds and filled with fog. The road itself is an engineering marvel.
8:00 a.m.
Brazilians don't care much for the jungle. They stay at the cabin. I explore the jungle.
1:30 p.m.
DO NOT smell the green ones.
2:00 p.m.
Nosebleed stops.
6:30 p.m.
Jungle mosquitoes are overrated. Twelve hours spent in a tropical rainforest, and they have given me no problem.
8:30 p.m.
Jungle mosquitoes are nocturnal. They swarm. They bite through jeans.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Day 15: Fruit Market
Open air fruit market is a misleading name. It is an open air everything market. The first fruit stand has me mesmerized. So many colors. Every shape and size imaginable. What's that? Can you even eat this? These ones smell like steak! "Robert, what are all these fruits?"
"This stand only has bananas."
Mind. Blown.
A nearby orange guy has even more different kinds of oranges than the banana guy had bananas. I suspect some of those "oranges" are actually grapefruits, but decide to let it go.
Most of my life, I've been used to eating fruit that was picked when green, and ripened in a shipping container. These vine ripened fruits are still in the hands of the farmers who picked them this morning. The meat is still breathing when you order it. As for exotic drinks they have Coca-Cola imported all the way from ...Georgia.
The ubiquitous samba music is drowned out in many places by shouting vendors. This is how I always imagined the floor of the New York Stock Exchange looked before they had computers. Except suits and ties are replaced with straw fedoras and machetes.
They have everything here. How do you say bootlegged DVD in Portuguese?
Paraguay.
How about counterfeit Rolex? Rolex Paraguay. Are those NBA jerseys made of.. wool? Paraguay.
This place is hilarious.
"This stand only has bananas."
Mind. Blown.
A nearby orange guy has even more different kinds of oranges than the banana guy had bananas. I suspect some of those "oranges" are actually grapefruits, but decide to let it go.
Most of my life, I've been used to eating fruit that was picked when green, and ripened in a shipping container. These vine ripened fruits are still in the hands of the farmers who picked them this morning. The meat is still breathing when you order it. As for exotic drinks they have Coca-Cola imported all the way from ...Georgia.
The ubiquitous samba music is drowned out in many places by shouting vendors. This is how I always imagined the floor of the New York Stock Exchange looked before they had computers. Except suits and ties are replaced with straw fedoras and machetes.
They have everything here. How do you say bootlegged DVD in Portuguese?
Paraguay.
How about counterfeit Rolex? Rolex Paraguay. Are those NBA jerseys made of.. wool? Paraguay.
This place is hilarious.
Monday, April 16, 2012
Day 12: Slum Singer
Work at the slum begins. The kids have never seen an American before, but they know better than to believe I'm one. My eyes are too dark and my hair isn't blond.
I narrate everything I do or see in English. Their response is enthusiastic. The school is instantly packed with scores of six year olds. English songs are demanded.
My set list: Baby Beluga, Father Abraham, He's got the Whole World in His Hands
I'm a rock star.
Actually I'm just the warmup act. We are here to put on an Easter play and sermon, but the favela electrical grid isn't good at dealing with PA systems.This school house is like 10 ft by 30 ft, but we brought the speakers and mic so we're going to use them.
I continue stalling with an encore of Father Abraham.
I narrate everything I do or see in English. Their response is enthusiastic. The school is instantly packed with scores of six year olds. English songs are demanded.
My set list: Baby Beluga, Father Abraham, He's got the Whole World in His Hands
I'm a rock star.
Actually I'm just the warmup act. We are here to put on an Easter play and sermon, but the favela electrical grid isn't good at dealing with PA systems.This school house is like 10 ft by 30 ft, but we brought the speakers and mic so we're going to use them.
I continue stalling with an encore of Father Abraham.
Day 11: Negotiations
We are expanding into a nearby squatters slum. They agree to let us use a mud hole (one of their finest) for free if it is to help the community. Yesterday we finished converting their fine mud hole into a fine school house.
Today they agree to let us use their fine new school house for only 200 reis per month if it is to help the community.
No way. Negotiations ensue.
Brazilian negotiations seem to include a good deal of coffee, some soccer debates, maybe a siesta, and a soccer game. Resolutions? Nope.
Everyone goes home happy. Wait... What? Everyone happy? What about the school?
Oh Cory. You and your silly Americanisms. You worry too much. Lets get some chocolate.
Today they agree to let us use their fine new school house for only 200 reis per month if it is to help the community.
No way. Negotiations ensue.
Brazilian negotiations seem to include a good deal of coffee, some soccer debates, maybe a siesta, and a soccer game. Resolutions? Nope.
Everyone goes home happy. Wait... What? Everyone happy? What about the school?
Oh Cory. You and your silly Americanisms. You worry too much. Lets get some chocolate.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Day 8: The Doorbell
Brazil has no doorbells. Shouting the name of an occupant works just fine. This was not a problem for me in Mexico. My neighborhood was quiet in Mexico.
Within earshot of my front door right now a man is fixing his car accompanied by samba. His speakers are blown, but that's no reason to turn down the volume. There are two ongoing soccer games, three gossiping circles, a crowing rooster, two barking dogs, two construction projects, and a tree being cut down.
Also, I have the hardest name in the world.
Cory.
The open 'O' followed by an American 'R' delivers a one-two knockout punch to even the most tenacious tongue. Trying to get the correct "o" they loudly cycle through vowels like a tone deaf drunkard attempting to find a pitch.
The 'r' is significantly less confident. Confidence is a significant source of volume.
Exhausted from the strain, no one ever makes it all the way to the simply 'y' at the end of my name. This final 'y' only occurs as an afterthought, and is filled with disappointment and defeat.
The best case scenario sounds something like "qweiaAAwd-derrr... eh". So from my apartment all I hear is "waa" or sometimes "woa". This might have worked in Mexico. My neighborhood was quiet in Mexico.
Within earshot of my front door right now a man is fixing his car accompanied by samba. His speakers are blown, but that's no reason to turn down the volume. There are two ongoing soccer games, three gossiping circles, a crowing rooster, two barking dogs, two construction projects, and a tree being cut down.
Also, I have the hardest name in the world.
Cory.
The open 'O' followed by an American 'R' delivers a one-two knockout punch to even the most tenacious tongue. Trying to get the correct "o" they loudly cycle through vowels like a tone deaf drunkard attempting to find a pitch.
The 'r' is significantly less confident. Confidence is a significant source of volume.
Exhausted from the strain, no one ever makes it all the way to the simply 'y' at the end of my name. This final 'y' only occurs as an afterthought, and is filled with disappointment and defeat.
The best case scenario sounds something like "qweiaAAwd-derrr... eh". So from my apartment all I hear is "waa" or sometimes "woa". This might have worked in Mexico. My neighborhood was quiet in Mexico.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Day 7: Soccer Shoes
Soccer doesn't require a formal goal. Any target will do. Moving targets are more fun. The wheels of a car move nicely. If the driver sees you or the ball coming he will slow down. It doesn't count if he slows down; that's too easy. A large blind spot covers the rear wheels so they're too easy also.
Brazilian logic on proper footwear: The streets are filthy. Filth covered shoes are no good. Flip flops reduce agility. Soccer requires agility. Glass in your foot? Remove glass. Rinse with muck. Back in game. Shoes are still clean. Nice.
My logic: shoes.
Brazilian logic on proper footwear: The streets are filthy. Filth covered shoes are no good. Flip flops reduce agility. Soccer requires agility. Glass in your foot? Remove glass. Rinse with muck. Back in game. Shoes are still clean. Nice.
My logic: shoes.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Day 2: God and Soccer
Corinthians are beating Oeste 2-0
Church starts soon...
Goal! 3-0
Church starts no.
But it's 3-0!!
Rob is a bible study leader at the church. Wont they be expecting us?
3-0 Brother! This doesn't just happen every day!
Church started 10 minutes ago.
This is ok. Only the Palmieristas will be there anyway.
20 minutes late.
Relax, the preacher is Corinthiano. He will understand.
We arrive 30 minutes late.
The preacher is 31 minutes late.
Church starts soon...
Goal! 3-0
Church starts no.
But it's 3-0!!
Rob is a bible study leader at the church. Wont they be expecting us?
3-0 Brother! This doesn't just happen every day!
Church started 10 minutes ago.
This is ok. Only the Palmieristas will be there anyway.
20 minutes late.
Relax, the preacher is Corinthiano. He will understand.
We arrive 30 minutes late.
The preacher is 31 minutes late.
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